Imus in the Morning?
Now that the hub bub has died down a bit, I am ready to put my two cents in the dialogue. Imus was clearly in the wrong with his comments. I join with the consenus of the US who agree that his words were inappropriate and demeaning.
I also appreciate his apologies and what would appear to be well meaning sorrow for his comments. But having said that, the new question on the table is ‘Now what?’ What should happen to Imus that would ‘pay’ for the crimes against the Rutgers ladies basketball players? Was his admission and apology enough? Was the 2 week ‘vacation’ enough? Was being fired enough?
If we really wanted a reasonable justice to take place in this matter, two things need to occur. If Imus indeed really harmed someone, there should be– reasonably– a fair punishment to Imus. That’s fair isn’t it. It should be a reasonable objective discipline that costs Imus something, acts as a reminder and deterrent to him and other shock jocks. But that is incomplete. Secondly, there should be actions that restore to the ladies whatever Imus took from them.
The fair thing that should happen is a mutually agreed upon process of restoration involving Imus and the ladies. Let’s assume that he took honor away from the ladies. This is a very reasonable conclusion. They are people, made in God’s image and worthy of being held up in honor and respect. Not to mention the fact that they were also the runner up national champions and had earned the right to be honored.
For Imus to treat them and their efforts with disdain, prejudice, contempt, or even indifference was a horrific crime. His comments verbally objectified people to whom real honor and worth was due. He robbed them of public glory. They experienced among other things, a debt.
So the question to the ladies is this, “What was that crime worth to you?” Put some thought into the question. What was the real value of what Imus’ thoughtless perverse words took from you? Was the robbery of low value to you? If it was of low value, then his apology was probably more than enough to honor you and to restore the honor grabbed. On the other hand, if you really down deep beleive that you are a person to whom great honor was due, then perhaps the apology didn’t restore you to wholeness– or even come close?
If the latter is true, than for you to accept his apology was a self-inflicted debasement and objectification. Let me give you an image. If someone stole $10,000 from you; only later to give you $1000 and a sincere apology, you have a couple of choices. You can accept the $1000 (along with the $9000 debt) and swallow the debt yourself— or you can maintain the forgiveness/reconciliation process until the full debt is fully paid.
If you think that you are a person of real worth, and that Imus stole public glory from you, and has only ‘paid back’ a portion of the real debt that you experienced, what are you proclaiming to the world by your full acceptance of his apology. Ironically, you are committing a self-inflicted wound that looks a lot like what he did to you. You too have acted in a way that devalues your worth– you have accepted his assessment of your value and expected honor again– and have come short.
It is not a question of being a big person, or a good person, or a Christian, or a compassionate person. Inherently, you are saying that the intrinsic honor ascribed to you by his (lets assume) heartfelt apology fully paid you back. Is this what you really want to say? Or are you swallowing the debt yourself?
It is not a question of your sense of goodness, as much as your sense of your intrinsic worth. My guess, and ultimately it is not for me to say, but for the ladies themselves, is that the ladies have been rushed to forgive and have shortcutted a process that would have been a beautiful thing to watch. They are worth far, far more than the apology afforded. I hope that they really know that.